When the boss starts behaving badly everyone suffers. And in some cases it can lead to long-term bullying. Nathalie Odile gives some tips on how to soothe the beast

Bully or bossy?

The boss from hell has featured in most people’s working lives. The tantrums when tasks aren’t done the way they wanted, the snide comments and the failure to acknowledge any good work can all make for an unpleasant working environment.

Sometimes of course the boss is just in a bad mood or struggling to cope with a big deadline and deals with his or her stress inappropriately. But if their behaviour is consistently unpleasant then action must be taken. Whatever the reason, their behaviour is unacceptable and you don’t have to put up with it.

You should first assess in what way your boss is making your life difficult – are they simply not very good at communicating with people or are they consistently discriminating against individuals in the team?

“Whether you should confront them depends on the individual, the boss, the manner in which the boss is difficult, how long it's been going on for, and the attitude of the employer. There's no universal solution that will suit all situations," says Tim Field, founder of the national workplace bullying advice line.

“My first recommendation is to see if the difficult boss fits the profile of a bully (see side panel). If they don’t, then it can be worth approaching the boss in a firm, polite, but non-threatening way.”

Carolyn Jones, director for the Institute of Employment Rights agrees that trying to ignore the situation will only make it worse.

“Too often things just build up and up and then suddenly there is an explosion, the employee answers back or just storms out of the room. You really want to avoid this happening as it could lead to a grievance procedure against the employee because they spoke out of turn,” she says.

As soon as you feel your position is being undermined by your boss’ behaviour you should take action. If you feel up to confronting them directly it is important to be assertive during this meeting but not aggressive. Keep eye contact and if they say anything inappropriate ask them to repeat it as this may force them to think through what they are saying.

If this meeting fails to deliver anything but a negative response from your manager then Jones suggests monitoring and assessing the situation and taking notes of every event that would back up your case.

Make sure the notes include the date, time, what happened and who it involved, and if there were any witnesses as these could provide crucial evidence should the case end up in an employment tribunal.

Field knows from first-hand experience what it's like to work for a bullying boss – his life was made so unbearable he was eventually forced to leave his job. He warns that the stress of working in this sort of environment can have a damaging effect on your health. The injury to health caused by prolonged negative stress includes fatigue, anxiety, depression, immune system suppression, aches, pains, numbness and panic attacks.

“If the attitude of HR and management is to support the bully and shoot the messenger then the best solution is to leave. See this as a positive decision to not allow your health to be destroyed and your career wrecked by a loser. By leaving you also regain control of your situation,” he says.

Leaving, however, should be a last resort – after all why should you give up a job you enjoy because of someone else’s behaviour? If you take action early on it means you are more likely to be in control of the situation.

Explain what is happening to your union representative as they will be able to give you advice on how to proceed. And discuss what is happening with colleagues as they may be suffering too and will be happy to support your claim. Before lodging a grievance it is worth seeking a meeting with someone else in management who may be sympathetic to you.

If again this meeting is unproductive you will have to refer to your employer’s grievance procedure which is in your contract of employment. From now on you should always consult your union representative and ensure a third party is present at any meetings.

Under Section 10 of the Employment Relations Act 1999 workers have the right to be accompanied, where they are ‘required’ or ‘invited’ by the employer to attend certain disciplinary or grievance hearings; and where the employee has ‘reasonably requested’ to be accompanied.

If the internal grievance procedure proves ineffective the case will end up before an independent employment tribunal where your complaint will be heard by a panel of three people. They will then decide if you have been discriminated against.

According to Field, 65% of the enquiries he receives on his bullying helpline are from the public sector and in 90% of cases it is a manager bullying a subordinate. This makes for depressing reading but at least if they are communicating what is happening they have taken the first step to resolving the problem.

Contact the article's author