As you read this I’m travelling west to Blackpool for the annual UNISON LGBT conference. As a trans woman, and co-chair of UNISON’s transgender caucus, this is an important event in my calendar. That’s true for many other UNISON lesbian, gay, bisexual and trans activists too.
But important though this journey to conference is, it’s not the main focus of my thoughts today. On November 20th my thoughts – and those of many others – turn to Transgender Day of Remembrance. My thoughts are with those families around the world dealing with the loss of a loved one, a sibling, parent, partner or friend who’s life was cut short simply for identifying as trans or gender variant. To lose a life is tragic. To lose a life due to another’s prejudice and hatred is heartbreakingly cruel.
I remember the first time I faced real hatred for being trans. Someone I had never met, who didn’t know me at all, chose to unleash their prejudices towards me. I remember how scared I was, how frightened and vulnerable. I can still see their face, as clearly as I could back then. The jeers, the mocking, the ridicule. Their complete lack of compassion for another person who lived in their community. I was ‘different’. I looked ‘different’ to their view of gender normative. I acted ‘different’. And that was enough for them to torment, ridicule and then physically assault me. I should have been safe that evening. I was only a few hundred yards from home. But that didn’t matter. It often doesn’t.
It was a painful, frightening and terrible experience. But I survived because I got the help and support I needed. For me that support came from my family, my friends and my trade union, UNISON. I cannot ever thank them enough. It’s not exaggerating to say I simply would not be here without some very special people in UNISON’s northern region and LGBT group.
We are a trade union, not just a support network, but I believe many of our trans members feel a little closer together as UNISON acknowledges the terrible losses in our community. Many trans and gender variant people have similar experiences to mine. Things are getting better… slowly, but there is still so much more to do.
I never knew Rita Hester, who in 1998 in San Francisco was murdered just for being trans. Her death began the ‘Remembering Our Dead’ project; a vigil in 1999 became the Transgender Day of Remembrance. Since then, hundreds of names have been added to the roll-call of men and women from around the world, murdered because they were trans. We will not forget them.
So I ask you please to pause for a moment to remember. And let us all work together to be kinder to one another, to hold each other closer. We must see beyond the perceived ‘gender norms’ and accept we are all unique and we can all live together.
If you face discrimination at work because you are trans – speak to your union rep. It’s against the law and UNISON is determined to end transphobia. More on our work at unison.org.uk/out.